She hasn't been knitting...

I haven't knit a stitch in 10 days. I've looked at the two projects I'm supposed to be working on, but that's it. No knitting.

I have a deadline for my sister's Anemoi Mittens and it's only 14 days away. There's no way I'll be able to finish the pair up by then. If I get the first mitten done I'll be super proud of myself. I've knit about 10 rows passed the thumb gusset, but there's still at least another 20 rows left to knit before starting the decreases for the top and then the whole thumb. Knitting stranded takes time for me. And I'm not in love with the final product. The pattern isn't as clear as I'd like it to be...

And then I have my German Stockings. Some time a couple of weeks ago I thought I'd aim for having the pair done by Christmas. I'd love to wear them on Christmas Eve. But that won't happen. I've reached the easy part of them, working on the leg, but I don't have enough time. Knee socks have a long leg part...

So, why haven't I been knitting lately? Despite deadlines. Well, I wish I could tell you I'd done a million other exciting things instead, but sadly, I've just been too tired. Too tired. November was awful at work and December isn't much better. When I've come home in the evenings I've just crashed. The last two nights I've fallen asleep on the couch before 21/9pm. And that has been after severe struggle to keep my eyelids open fo quite some time.

The thought of knitting something that requires me to look at charts (as Anemoi Mittens and German Stockings do) has been too overwhelming. And knowing myself, I know that even the smallest mistake would leave me swearing in tears. I'm not a charming person when I'm tired. So, for the sake of my own, and my boyfriend's, sanity, I've kept from knitting.

It feels strange though. I haven't particularly missed it.

Maybe 'cause I've been creative in other ways? I'll tell you more about it some other time, but it involves trips down Memory Lane, a MacBook and the software Scrivener...

Keeping sickness and illness from one's family

I met my mother yesterday for a fika before my knitting group met up. She told me about seeing one of her friends/former colleagues, who were diagnosed with chronic cancer a couple of years ago. (To my understanding it means that her cancer is always present, but that it sometimes goes from taking a nap to being wide awake.) She's in treatment at the moment as her cancer decided to move into her liver and kick around in there.

At her latest doctor's appointment she was given good news about the treatment. The tumour had shrunk by one third. Hearing this my mother had asked how her friend's husband had reacted to the good news. She was told that the husband only heared it after the appointment was over "as he was waiting outside". This surprised my mother and she asked why he wasn't in there with her seeing the doctor. The response she got was "well, he prefers not seeing the doctors with me as he's not good with handling bad news and is really struggling with me being sick again".

They've been married for 30 years. And he's not in there to see the doctors. 'Cause "he's struggling".

This got me and my mother wondering how my mother's friend behaves when she's given bad news from her doctors. Is she sparing him the details? Does she deal with the pain, the anxiety and the worrying on her own?

I had a colleague who lost her father a couple of years ago. He had found out that he had some kind of kidney problem but he chose not to tell a soul. He got sicker and sicker but pretended everything was fine. And then he ended up in hospital and died two days later. Leaving his whole family in shock as they didn't have much or any time at all to prepare for what would come.

A woman I met while studying in Canada kept her disease a secret from her family while she was fighting it. Her family was on a different continent, several time zones away. She didn't want to worry them and she didn't want them to persuade her to come home. She wasn't done with Canada. And she knew she'd probably get better treatment there as well. But without her family close by.

I know of several people who've kept depressions from their families and friends. Who've struggled on their own. Sometimes letting it go so far that they end up in hospital before saying something.

What makes people do this? Why do they think they're sparing others when they keep sickness and illness to themselves? When they decide to go in battle on their own? Or when they decide to give up without support?

Do family, relatives and friends deserve to know when one gets sick? Do they have a right?

I don't know.

But I know I'd get mad as hell if any of my family members kept a serious disease or condition from me and I found out. I might thank them for wanting to keep me from woryring but then I'd smack them. 'Cause I'd be angry. And probably feel a bit offended. I wouldn't be comfortable knowing that I was considered "too weak" to be counted on as support.

'Cause that would be my role. I'd be the support. And I'd feel robbed if I wasn't given the chance.

And wouldn't most? Or is that just me being naïve and blue-eyed?

When I struggled with my depression some years ago (almost 7 years now; time flies) friends found out before my parents got the whole picture. But I did tell my parents about it. Several weeks before I hit bottom and had to call them to come and get me from my office floor. And knowing that I had already told them about my tears, my doubts, my anxiety and my fears, made it so much easier calling them for help. And they did help. I got picked up from work and driven straight to the psychiatric emergency. I moved back into my old room and lived with my parents and sister for two months. And during those months, they all took turns babysitting me. I wasn't left alone more than an hour at a time, and never in the evenings or at night. Not because we feared I might do something terrible (I wasn't ever suicidal) but becuase I was too scared to be on my own as I couldn't handle my anxieties and my tears when I was on my own. I was terrified of ending up hyperventilating on the floor again.

These months were tough on all of us. It wrecked my mother to see me sit hollow-eyed or teary. But mostly, it was hard for her that I doubted the person I was. That I didn't particularly like the person she had been a part of creating and loved. I don't think I've ever seen my father with such a deep wrinkle in his forehead. And my sister, taking on such a responsibility while still a teen... But... There's also something very real about crying in someone's arms. It creates bonds. Strong ones.

If I hadn't let my family help me through that year, I don't know if I'd feel as close to them as I do now. I don't know if I'd trust them as I do now. I sure hope I would, but I don't know.

I'm sure glad I let them be my support. And I know they appreciate it as well.

But did they have a right to know? Was I obliged to let them in? You tell me!

Sleepy me

I'm one of those who needs a lot of sleep. To function properly I should get at least 7-8 hours. During the work week, I go to bed at around 22/10pm and get up at 6am. On weekends I often sleep in 'til 9 or 9.30 even if I go to bed before midnight... If I get less than 6 hours of good sleep two nights in a row I become a wreck; I get physically sick.

(Me needing all that sleep is one (of many) reasons to why I'm not interested in having kids of my own...)

I've never been a true evening or night person, but when I was a teenager I could spend hours reading in bed. And when I was in Canada as an exchange student I stayed up longer as well. I had classes later than I had back home in Sweden, and I also had room mates who were more evening/night people than I was.

Not being an evening or night person doesn't automatically make me a morning person though. I get up when I have to and I don't have terrible manners before 7am, but if I have a choice; I stay in bed.

My boyfriend has been a bad influence on me in the mornings as he's a snoozer. I never owned an alarm with a snooze button on it before meeting him, and therefor I hadn't learnt how to snooze. I'd just get up when the alarm went off. Or I'd set the alarm half an hour earlier than I'd actually have to get up and when it went off, I'd reset it for 30 minutes at once.

Now, I often get tempted to stay in bed for another 10 minutes. And maybe another 10. On a rare occasion, I'll stay for three snoozes. And when I do, I get angry with myself as I don't seem to ever wake up those days.

The other day was one of those days. And to prove my point I can tell you that I, in the park on my way home from work, mistook a bench for a cow...

Wandering mind on a Saturday

My work consists of spending a lot of time in front of the computer. Or sit in on different meetings. (This week I did, however, leave the office to go "sightseeing" with one of my colleagues. We took a car and drove for twenty minutes to check out a library and take pictures of trees in a forrest. A most exciting afternoon for me...)

I do spend time on the computer in the evenings and on weekends but I limit myself. Partly because I need to do other things, partly because of my boyfriend and the attention I want to give him and our life together, and partly because I know I can get way too involved in the "fake world" of Internet communities.

I email friends. I spend time writing in my blogs. I read others' as well. I have an account on Ravelry and I spend on average fifteen minutes there every day. I'm a member of a forum with some of my knitting friends (I'm one of the least active on it). I post pictures on Flickr and check out my friends' contributions.

I don't do Twitter. I don't have an account on Facebook. I don't join discussions on Ravelry or participate in the forums. I don't get involved with people or in groups on Flickr.

My two main reasons to stay away from Facebook and Twitter are my need of privacy and my fear of getting too involved. I had a couple of years, while being a student, in which I spent way too much time in the computer lab socializing on chats and forums. I knew the names of the security guards that came on nightly rounds to check the university premises. They knew mine.

I had a lot of fun during these years, and I met people I'd never meet without the Internet; the short twin from Stockholm, the British girl who lived in Gothenburg, the guy who looked like Kalle on the kaviartubes and the swimmer who had a sick dad. But... It was tough on my life in general. I made my Internet friends a priority over my other friends. And my family. And my studies. And I knew I wasn't doing anything good when I started to lie to people around me so they wouldn't know exactly how much time I spent in the computer lab or where I was spending the weekend.

Things changed about 6 years ago, and I dramatically cut down on my Internet time. I still keep in touch with some of my Internet friends from "back then" (crrly and monaihallen to mention two) but most of the relationships I had with people faded and vanished.

Now I'm more picky with the people I chose to communicate with over the Internet. And I don't give them the time I used to give my Internet-relationships. And I don't feel (too) guilty for chosing to let emails wait for replies or comments to go unanswered. 'Cause I'm not willing to get too wrapped up in the Internet world again. Therefor, I'm doing things more on my own terms.

.....

I've been wandering. I started this post talking about my job and the amount of time I spend in front of the computer during the day. I was supposed to go from there to the fact that I'm not glued to the computer in the evenings and on weekends. And the point of the post would be to tell you all that I've spent approximately 5 hours playing with our new MacBook Pro today. What a Saturday!

7 weird facts about me

I know this meme hasn't really been in motion for a long time, but as I never got around to share 7 weird facts about me and my life when it was popular, I'm doing it now.

1. I'm addicted to using Q-tips/cotton swabs in my ears. Cleaning my ears with a Q-tip is among the five first things I do every morning (waking up, getting out of bed, peeing and brushing my hair are the other four) and I do another round before going bed. I hate the sticky feeling of not having cleaned my ears.
   
   
2. When working at my computer I always keep programs opened in a certain order; Outlook, Windows Media Player, then Internet Explorer followed by Acrobat, Word and Excel. When I use any of our other work-related programs, they go after Internet Explorer. If I already have one of the latter programs open, for example Word, and need to open our special programs, I close Word and reopen it after the other program has been set up.
   
   
3. I have gotten locked up in the city library once!
   
   I taught myself how to read when I was 4 and I've always loved books. Growing up I was most often found with my head in a book. I read anything really; romantic and tragic stories à la Virginia Andrews, thrillers and scary novels á la Stephen King or mysteries à la Enid Blyton or, later, Agatha Christie.
   
   One Saturday afternoon when I was 15 years old, I was curled up in a couch in the kid's section of the city library when I noticed it had gotten darker around me. I looked up from my book (I believe I was rereading either Thursday's Child or Ballet Shoes by Noel Streatfeild) and realized that there were no lights on in the library. I also noticed that it was awfully quiet. I couldn't hear a thing.
   
   I got up from the sofa to find the whole library deserted and the main doors locked. After having walked around trying to find a janitor or something that would let me out, and after having checked my pockets for change so I could use the phones and call for help, I checked one of the entrances next to the main doors and found it to have a lock I could open without a key. I stepped out, waiting for an alarm to go off and was surprised to find that there were none.
   
   I guess not many people can claim to having been locked up in a city library! (Ten minutes before closing the library everyone was, politely, told to get out of there. I showed up five minutes before closing thinking they were open for another hour. I used the side entrance and slipped right into the kid's section and didn't see everyone moving towards the main exits... As I was sitting by the window I got the light from outside and didn't react to the fact that they put out the lights.)
   
   
4. I can't ever become a blood donor as I was infeceted by malaria in the mid-90's while spending time in East Africa.
   
   
5. I have a thing for the white stuff on citruses and the "strings" you can get on bananas. I can't stand the texture in my mouth. I peel all the white stuff off. It takes me superlong to get a clementine, mandarine or an orange ready for me to actually eat it as I pick and pick. And pick.
   
   
6. I eat meat. But I don't eat meat that I have just seen close to a bone. I cut the meat from my pork chops ½cm from the bone. I don't do chicken drums or wings. I do breasts.
   
   I guess seeing meat close the bone reminds me of the fact that what I'm eating used to be alive. I have a hard time eating fish if there's skin left on it or, even worse, the fish is served whole; with the head, fins, skin and everything.
   
   
7. When we're on the subject of things I can't stand; I'm utterly disgusted by worms, snails, slugs, jelly fish, leeches, eels, octopuses, squids and anything slimey like that. It doesn't matter if I see them alive or dead, in reality or in pictures. I get goose bumps. And shiver. And have to look away. (Not as much with the worms as with the rest of pack, but wet days when the pavement is full of worms can leave me teary and very upset.) Watching underwater programs on TV, I have to hold the remote in hand so I can switch channels when they get to the eels, giant jelly fish, octopuses and squids.
   
   I don't dream nightmares (can remember three that I've had in my entire life), but some of the worst things I can imagine in life would be getting a bucket of jellyfish, slugs, leeches and squid thrown over my head or being forced to stick my hand in a barrel of octopuses, eels, worms and snails. (Just thinking about it here gives me goose bumps and makes me shiver...)
   
   Rhubarbsky used to have a picture in her banner of a snail climbing up a shoe. I'm sure most people found it cute. I read her blog posts from my Google Reader so I wouldn't have to go to her blog...
   
   I have once stepped on a slug and instantly thrown up.
   
   This summer, I stepped on a slug while barefoot, and ended up crying in our shower while franticly trying to get the slime off of my foot and from between my toes. We had guests.

Getting to know me - 7

It's been ages since my last "Getting to know me"-post. I thought it was about time I'd get back to it.

The Random Integer Generator told me to answer question number 40 this week:

What was the most difficult paycheck you ever earned?

I don't think I've earned many paychecks that have been difficult as in having to perform something difficult. I think the ones I found difficult were the ones that were boring.

For six months in junior high I helped out in a print shop every other Tuesday after school to earn some money. I was going to England in the summer and the agreement was that I'd have to earn my own spending money before going. In the print shop I spent hours glueing covers on small notebooks. I'd take a note book from one pile and a cover from another. Fold the cover along two lines and then put glue on part of the cover. Place the cover in the right position on the note book and press firmly. Put in a pile with a heavy book on top. Repeat. :yawn:

One fall in junior high I "sålde jultidningar" for Christmas. I don't know if kids still do this in Sweden but when I was younger it was a way for kids and youth to earn some extra money around Christmas. Basically you knocked on your neighbours' door trying to sell them magazines, comics and books from a catalogue you showed them. They'd (hopefully) place an order with you and then you got the magazines, comics and books sent to you a couple of weeks before Christmas and you had to deliver the orders. Some parents would take the catalogue to their work place trying to get their colleagues to buy something. As a kid you'd earn accordingly to what you sold for. The more sells, the more you'd earn. The information folder you got sent to you before starting to sell was full of success stories from smiling boys and girls saying how much fun it was selling, how easy it was, how much money they had sold for and what they had gotten from their pay. But it wasn't fun. It wasn't easy. And I didn't earn much.

In high school and after, I spent many summers working mostly outdoors. I loved the job. Even though it forced me to get up every morning at 6am... I usually had fun with my colleagues. I also liked the amount of responsibility I was given. My bosses and the people who saw the result of my job, ususally didn't care about how I got things done as long as they were made before the end of the day. Some summers were more hard work than others. It depended on where in the city I worked, the people around me and definitely the weather. My first summer in the early '90s had a lot of rainy days. I worked a total of 35 days (7 weeks) that summer and I only had 5 days that were completely dry... On rainy days we had to be very imaginatory and sometimes come up with tasks to keep us busy for 8 hours. That was sometimes hard. Especially day after day... (On a whole I loved my summer job and kept returning to it. It was just difficult during rainy days and periods.)

After my university studies I got a "temporary job" that lasted for more than a year and a half. It wasn't the most ideal job for me. A lot of people in the company didn't understand my function and why I was there. Many of them thought the results of my work would affect the employees badly, so I constantly had to fight the negative image they had of me even before they'd met me. A lot of people also showed surprising stupidity when it came to understand the amount of time I needed to give them proper results. I was constantly chased. I didn't earn my pay checks with happiness during these months... (One of the happiest days in my life was going in to my then-boss to tell him I had gotten another job. A "proper one".)

What was the most difficult paycheck you ever earned? Let me know by leaving a comment or by making your own blog post about it. (If you do the latter, please tell me so I don't miss it!)

Getting to know me - 6

I thought today would be a good day to post again for "Getting to know me". If I was to talk about knitting I'd just be repeating whatever I've said the last couple of days. My head is swamped with combinations of favourite yarns from my stash and patterns. I'm really leaning towards swatching for a Laminaria in the Cherry Blossom Fibers' sock yarn (see pictures in this post)...

This week I'll answer question number 18:

What is your all-time favourite movie?

The first that comes to mind is The Princess Bride. I simply love it. I love the dialogue. I love the storyline. And the characters. If I'm not mistaken I was something like 14 years old when I saw it the first time. A friend of mine had rented it for a sleepover simply because she thought Fred Savage (from The Wonder Years) was one of the cutest guys on the planet.

I don't know how many times I've seen it since then. I had a class mate in high school who also loved the movie and we used to laugh our a$$es off as we went through the dialogue and "played out" some of the best parts. Noone else in our class had seen it and they all just sighed at us when we got started.

There's a VHS-copy of the movie in a drawer at home. I've never own a VCR myself. Sometimes I'd go to the video store and rent a movie and a movie box so I could spend time watching "The Princess Bride". The VHS was bought in England when I was there as a 15-year-old, and therefore it doesn't have any subtitles. The sound quality is kind of blah and I couldn't get anyone else to love the movie as much as I did. They didn't hear the dialogue properly and didn't have any subtitles to read. Me laughing or repeating the dialogue out loud probably didn't help either... (Thinking about this makes me all nostalgic!)

About two years ago, I recorded the movie on DVD as it was shown on Swedish tv. Unfortunately there's no sound in half of the movie. Don't know why. But it bugs me to hell and I haven't watched it more than once from that DVD. Guess I should get a proper store-bought version of it.

For some reason the title has been changed to "Bleka dödens minut" in Sweden. Translated that becomes "The Pale Death's Minute"... Uhm? It sounds plain stupid, doesn't it?

~~~~~

Have you seen The Princess Bride? Like it? Love it? Or not?

~~~~~

Other favourite movies that come to mind (for different reasons) are:

Alive
Dead Poet's Society
Singles
Reality Bites
Reservoir Dogs
Grease
Dirty Dancing
Amélie (of Montmartre)
Sleepers
Stand by me
Dancer in the Dark

~~~~~

What's your favourite movie? And why? I'd love to know! Either tell me your answer in a comment or make a post in your own blog. (If you do the latter, please let me know so I don't miss your answer!)

Getting to know me - 5

I'm sorry I didn't post a "Getting to know you"-post last week but my head was too busy to deal with it.

Today I'll answer question number 160:

Do you ever cry when you're happy?

Anyone who's been around me for an extended period of time will know that I do. I cry easily. I cry when I'm sad. Frustrated. Angry. Scared. Nervous. Happy. Overwhelmed.

And I always have. As long as I can remember.

I cry when I see movies. I cry when I listen to music. I cry when I read books or magazines. I cry when I listen to the radio. I cry when I watch sports. I cry when I hear speeches at parties or weddings.

And it doesn't have to be because of sad things happening. It can be someone scoring a beautiful goal and expressing happiness after it. Or a lion cub surviving a dry summer. Or teenage girls becoming best friends again after a fight. Or someone achieving a goal of some sort. Or when my sister told me she got the scolarship for a year's studies in Canada. Or when I open gifts. Or when my cats are cute together.

At least once a week, I get teary while looking at my boyfriend. Not because of what he's wearing or something nasty he said, but simply because I get overwhelmed with happiness and all sorts of feelings when I think of how important he is to me.

Speaking about crying in general, I have many memories of crying in front of the TV or in a cinema. Or when reading.

- I took my younger sister to see Bambi when she was 5 (or thereabouts). I cried so much when Bambi's mother died, that my sister got embarrassed and sat closer to the woman on her other side hoping nobody would think she was there with me.

- When I was in my early teens, I saw Dead Poet's Society three times in the cinema. And I cried so much walking home from the first time that a couple stopped me on the street to ask if I was alright. The other two times I saw it, I started crying before the sad parts just knowing that they'd come.

- At fifteen or so, my family was invited to a big party at a newly-opened cinema. We were supposed to see a movie and then eat from a huge buffet table. I had to leave after the movie as I was a total wreck from seeing "A Perfect World" with Kevin Costner and Clint Eastwood. I remember tripping real bad on my way home as I couldn't see the curb properly through my tears.

- At home I would often move from sitting on the couch to lying on the floor as I would get teased awfully by my family if they saw me crying. If I was on the floor, I could sometimes hide it better (or just longer).

- I'm an ugly cryer. You know the kind; eyes get puffy, nose gets red, skin gets blotchy and tears mix with snot on the way down the face. Well, this one time I was at the public library reading. I was sitting on a couch in the kid's section (where the most comfy couches were), crying my eyes out because of something in a book, when a little boy came by. I looked up and he stopped his walking and just stared at me. Then he walked away and continued reading. A minute later he came back with a tissue that he handed me without a word. Then he ran off.

~~~~~

What about you? Do you ever cry when you're happy? I'd love to know! Either tell me your answer in a comment or make a post in your own blog. (If you do the latter, please let me know so I don't miss your answer!)

Getting to know me - 4

So, here's round 4 of Getting to know me.

This week's question is number 256:

When was the last time you gave someone advice that turned out to be just the thing he or she should have done?

This one took some thinking. Nothing really came to mind after reading the question and thinking for a couple of minutes. I was about to give up and ask the random number generator for another number - yes, I was about to cheat! - but then I realized that I gave my boyfriend some good advice this weekend that he really should've listened to.

We've had great summery weather here the last two weeks or so. Clear blue sky. Sunshine. High temperatures (at least for us at the end of May and beginning of June: 20-25 Degrees Celsius/68-77 Fahrenheit). It's been very windy though so some days have felt way cooler.

My boyfriend loves to be outdoors. He will stay out as much as possible and thinks I'm such an alien for going inside when the sun sets... This weekend, I told him - as I always do when he's outside in bright sun - to be careful of the sun and use protection. None of us are any good at sunblock lotions but at least I stay in the shade or cover up. He doesn't. I told him to bring a cap to the beach and not forget about bringing it when we got there. He did. Both bring the cap and forget he brought it.

He also sat and lay down for a long time only wearing his bathing shorts.

His head, his shoulders, his arms, his back, his stomach and the back of his thighs were pink as a pig when we drove home... He said it didn't hurt. But then again, he's not the whiner in our family, I am.

~~~~~

Wanna play along with me? Please do!!! Either tell me your answer in a comment or make a post in your own blog. (If you do the latter, please let me know so I don't miss your answer!

Getting to know me - 3

Time for round three (round one and round two). This week, the random number generator I use to pick questions, told me take care of question number 351.

Have you ever gone to a party or other function very overdressed or underdressed for the occassion? If you had to stand out at a party, would you rather be too fancy or too casual?

First thing that comes to mind is my sister's graduation from high school. In Sweden most people celebrate this day with some kind of party for friends and family. The students are very often picked up from school in a special vehicle and before they're brought home they circle through town honking their horns. At least that is the custom in most high schools in the part of Sweden I live in.

The special vehicle can be anything from a fancy-schmancy car to a decorated lorry. I was picked up in an Indian rickshaw and biked through town. There has been girls and boys being picked up on elephants, on horses, in helicopters or double-deckers from London.

Anyways, back to my sister's graduation day. I had had hectic days before The Day as I was helping my parents out with organizing and preparing for the party. I was in charge of making some desserts and a biiiiig banner to hang over the door to welcome her home. I had missed my day in the laundry room. And the weather changed from being rainy all week to being bright and sunny on her graduation day. I had planned on wearing clothes fit for rain. And my summer clothes were either unpacked (from the back of the wardrobe where they hide most of the year), rinkled and unwashed or simply unwashed.

I ended up wearing clothes that were all too warm and too casual. Looking at pictures from that day I get embarrassed...


If I'd rather be overdressed or underdressed? Difficult one. It all depends on the situation and the company. I'd say that I'd prefer overdressed in more situations as it'd show that I'd made an effort, but sometimes I just feel silly when I realize everyone else shows up in "relax clothes" and I've put make up on.

Thinking about it, I suffer more when I'm dressed "wrong for the occassion" in a practical way than in what it looks like. Did that make any sense? I get embarrassed if I show up in sandals and I was expected to wear sneakers as everyone is going to play football. Or if I wear shorts and we're all walking through fields with thistels in them. Or if I brought a big back pack stuffed with extra clothing and it turns out to be too heavy for me to carry and someone else (read boyfriend) has to help me out. Or if I didn't bring a jacket and is the only one freezing enough to want to go inside... Know what I mean?

~~~~~

Wanna play along with me? Please do!!! Either tell me your answer in a comment or make a post in your own blog. (If you do the latter, please let me know so I don't miss your answer!

Getting to know me - 2

Tomorrow I'm going out of town again for work. I usually try to go by train when I'm being sent off to other cities, but this time I need to fly. Going by land would have taken way too long. Both for me and the company I work for...

So, as not to stress me out too much tomorrow when I have about a zillion things to take care of before going to the airport, I thought I'd post the second round of "Getting to know me".

This week's question is number 232:

What do you enjoy doing, even consider fun, that most other people regard as hard work?

Oh, a lot of different things come to mind. First I think I'd have to say knitting. Yes, I know that most readers of this blog are knitters themselves, but still. Most people in the world do not knit. And a lot of them think knitting is hard work.

Secondly, me biking to work instead of driving. I think it's silly as it only takes me about ten minutes to bike to work, but I guess some people love their cars. Especially when it rains...

Thirdly, I use my English every day. Not just by listening to it on TV, but I read and write something in English every day. Most of my Swedish friends don't do that. (And if I should admit to something slightly embarrassing, I also talk to myself in English almost every day...)

Fourthly, I always loved calculus, trigonometry and algebra. When I was in school and in university, I could spend hours working on algebra equations and totally forget things around me. I still get warm on the inside thinking about the joy of simplifying a difficult expression by using different rules of algebra and trigonometry. Nowadays, I hardly ever have to use that knowledge... (But I was happy last week to tell boyfriend that I could design his storage idea for the garage by taking some measurements of the sloping ceiling and use my trigonometry skills to work out everything he needed.)

~~~~~

Wanna play along with me? Please do!!! Either tell me your answer in a comment or make a post in your own blog. (If you do the latter, please let me know so I don't miss your answer!

Working on the garage

Thank you to all of you who decided to play along in the first round of "getting to know me". I really liked reading all your answers. And I hope you all will like to play along in the next round later on this week.

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Thanks for telling me you like my blog mess/mix. :)

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I'm sore today. And I expect it to be worse by tomorrow.

When boyfriend and I decided to buy ourselves a house last year, one of our agreements were that he would take main responsability of the garden and I'd care about what the inside of the house looked like. He was the one who really wanted a garden and I find noooo pleasure what so ever in mowing lawns, water plants, dig and carry. He does. I care about nice cushions in the cough, colours that match, neat looking place mats and such. He doesn't really.

So it was an easy agreement to come to.

At one point though, I made a promise I kind of regret now. I promised I would paint the garage this year...

I spent an awful lot of hours working outdoors this weekend. My idea of "enjoying the garden" usually involves a blanket, a good book and a glass of water. I only had half an hour of that this weekend. And that was after all the hours of work. I've used a steel brush on one of the walls to get rid of paint chips and I've used a scrubbing-brush and soapy water to get rid of algea on one of the short sides and parts of the longest side. I scrubbed for five hours yesterday and haven't even reached halfway...

It's was bit awkward as the wall is 3m/10ft high and I had to used a stepladder to reach the upper part. And even standing on the stepladder I had to work with my arms over my head. We all know how easy that is, right? When you have to apply force to something with your arms stretched over your head.

And imagine all the soapy water that ran down my arms... I was soaked.

And I still have so much left to do. Scrubbing the rest of the garage. Steel brushing the side that has the garage door in it. Apply two coats of paint.

Does anyone want to come and help me out?

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I was standing there on the stepladder, soaked and tired, wondering why people wanted to have their own house and garden - and all the work that comes with it - when boyfriend asked me to come up on the roof as he wanted to show me something. After a lot of bravery on my side (having to climb a ladder) I got up.

And we sat on the roof watching the world around us. What a view we have from up there. We spied on our neighbours and checked out their gardens. We saw kids playing in the playground. We relaxed in the breeze.

Getting to know me - 1

Looking for a note card this weekend, I opened a wooden box I made in school when I was 13 years old, and found a book I thought I had gotten rid off. It's a small book I got when I studied in Canada for a year. It's called "Getting to know you" and in it one finds 365 questions or activities that will "enhance relationships".

There's a special history connected to this book and seeing it brought up a lot of different feelings in me. And I remembered things I had (almost) forgotten. Conversations in a sauna. Laughter. Whispers. Friendships. Basically there was a group of us meeting up answering questions from this book. The answers sometimes led to discussions that kept us occupied for a long time. Sometimes the round of answering was quick and we moved on. There's only one person from this group that I still stay in touch with. (Hej Mona!)

Finding the book, and looking through it, I came up with the idea of using it in my blog.

I know this blog is a mess when it comes to structure and content. I mix knitting and sewing updates with personal reflections and stories about my cats. This probably bugs some people who would prefer this blog to be either "totally craft" or "totally personal". But I don't really care. I like the mix here. My thoughts and experiences are just as much part of me as my crafty side is, and I don't feel like separating them.

To make matters worse/better (guess it all depends on who you are) I thought I'd bring some more personal aspects to this blog. Once a week I will post a random question from the book and give you all my answer. I haven't picked a specific day of the week for this to happen. Partly because I'm not organized enough for that and partly becasue I want to keep you at the edge of your seat in anticipation... :)

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This week's question is number 31:

What do you think is your worst habbit? What do others think your worst habbit is?

My worst habbit is probably that I procrastinate. All the time. I always end up doing things at the last minute. And people usually have to ask me more than once for me to do things for them. Or for myself.

When I was in school I was the one studying for tests the day before. Writing my first paper in Canada, I had to pull an all-nighter as I had started the process way too late and hadn't taken into account how much longer it would take me to do it in English as oppose to in Swedish. I file my taxes at the last minute even though I have a month do them. I buy a new tube of toothpaste when the old one is all used up as I can't be bothered/don't remember to do it in advance. I'm almost in panic mode to prepare for meetings and presentations I've known of for weeks, and sometimes even months. I buy gifts a couple of days before Christmas (one year I bought all of them on Christmas Eve). Just to give you some examples...


I'm sure this bad habbit frustrates others as well (ask my mother and boyfriend and they will probably give you more examples of my procrastination skills) but I think there's another habbit that more people react to. I have great difficulties keeping my legs still while sitting or standing. The shaking starts not long after I sit down or stand up and it's something I don't think about. Until someone asks me to stop the shaking... Or asks me if I'm restless or bored...

I've had this shaking going on as long as I can remember. And for years it has driven my family nuts at the dinner table where everything would shake in sync with my legs. And I wouldn't notice... I've had people ask me to stop when I've been on busses and my legs have started to shake so badly that the person in front of me could feel it through the seat. Or people in a cinema who would get annoyed as I got their row to shake. I was once asked, while standing on a train, if I didn't know that there were toilets on the train...

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Wanna play along with me? Please do!!! Either tell me your answer in a comment or make a post in your own blog. (If you do the latter, please let me know so I don't miss your answer!